The Dark Side

Everbody`s got a dark side
Do you love me?
Can you love mine?
Nobody`s a picture perfect

But we`re worth it

You know that we`re worth it 

Will you love me?
Even with my dark side? - Dark Side by Kelly Clarkson

    

     I question myself if im that awful kind of a person. It feels crappy when people tell you your negative sides all the time (or maybe because I am all the time?). There are times when I know its a false judgement but most of the time there`s probably truth in all of it. I appreciate these criticisms because it keeps you grounded but sometimes its a big downer especially when you already know whats not good in you more than anyone else and youre trying to change but you just cant because thats just the way you are. It makes me feel that I am the worst person in the planet. And these leads me to uneasiness when being with other people. Somehow even triggering a paranoia for socializing because you feel like even your good intentions might be misinterpreted as bad ones.

     I know I have feelings of insecurities, jealousy and a habit of being sarcastic and have unintentional insensitive jokes. I also do know that I am sometimes boastful, an annoying know-it-all who more needs the advices he/she says, and a potty mouth when something puts me off. But dont we all commit these negative traits too? The only thing I feel good in all these is that I accept and admit my dark side.  Because its so damn hard to be the nicest person in the room especially when you are dealing with people who also have the same problems and sometimes they are putting it out on you.

     Its hard to be just quiet and be understanding when your insecurities are rubbed in your face. But you see, I appreciate the people who have the courage to actually sit down and talk to me frankly and nicely if I annoy or hurt them in any way.  Not the coded messages and speak in riddles thing. Because I am slow to get the message and process it right away. ;P   No, seriously because its easier to explain and apologize when people actually talk face-to-face. When I actually see how I hurt someone`s feelings it makes me feel even more ashamed about what ive done. Its easier to talk and patch things up to a one-on-one conversation than getting into the habit of playing mind games and hope that person gets the message. Its also easy to know if that person is just telling the truth or just plainly judging without knowing.

     I may not be the most pleasant person. Nobody is perfect. I accept every negative sides I have and I am trying my best to change it. Humility is also an issue for me. Its hard to be humble on my side when all my life I have been put down and was forced to feel that I am unworthy of good things. That`s why when I excel on something I take too much pride in it and I admit that compliments feed my ego. That is because compliments are rare to me. I also know that I should stop being defensive and making excuses on my bad attitudes when being confronted like what im doing now. Im still learning the habit of shutting up and listening. "Humility is still under construction, thank you for your patience". LOL! ;D

     Well, at least I know what I am and I have the courage to admit that yes, I am an awful person.  But despite of all these, I am very grateful to my loved ones (family and friends) who understand and accept me. The ones who see my vulnerability and good intentions. The ones who can see the light past my dark side.  Thank you for not giving up on me and you all know who you are if  you`re reading this post. :) 

   

Easy Caramelized Apple Cinnamon

 Its been a loooong time since ive blogged about something and just thought of sharing this recipe. Lately ive been trying and practicing to make crepes. Since I love Apple Pies I just thought, why not make Apple Cinnamon Crepes?!:D  Making the filling is so easy!  Here`s how! :)

Ingredients:

2 Apples (Peeled and sliced into cubes)

5 Tbsps. Butter

1 Tbsp. Lemon Juice

3-4 Tbsps. Brown Sugar or Granulated Sugar

1-2 Tbsps. Ground Cinnamon or Cinnamon Sugar

1 Tbsp. Cornstarch dissolved in a small amount of water.

1 Tbsp. Vanilla Essence

Left to Right: Lemon Juice, Cinnamon (Caramel) Sugar, Granulated Sugar and Vanilla Essence 

Directions

1. Placed the sliced apples in a bowl, followed by the lemon juice, sugar, cinnamon or cinnamon sugar ( I used Cinnamon Caramel Sugar), and vanilla essence. Mix all the ingredients together.
2. Leave the sliced apples mixture for 20 minutes and wait for the flavors to blend with the apples` natural juices. 

Cinnamon and Sugar Marinated Apples;)

    3.   Heat a pan and melt the butter. 

Melting the butter

   4.  When the butter is already melted. Put in the apple slices and saute the apples. Boil the apples in its         own juice and let some of the liquid dissolve. Turn off the heat when the apples turn brown or soft and add the dissolved cornstarch in the apple mixture to thicken the apple cinnamon sauce.

  5.  Transfer the Caramelized Apple Cinnamon in a bowl and wait for it to cool. You can also store it in a covered container and keep it in the fridge until youre ready to use it. You can make it a filling on crepes and apples pies or add it in your cereals or oatmeal.  Happy Eating! :D

Spring Look (Fuchsia Lips/Bright Eyes) + Revlon Just Bitten in Sweetheart/Valentine Review

        

       Springtime is here!:D  Its the time to go on picnics, barbecue/outdoor parties and sakura (cherry blossoms) viewing!:)  Even though I have just recovered from a bad cold and pollen allergy, it wont stop me from going outdoors to enjoy my 2nd favorite season!:D Fall/Autumn is my 1st favorite. ;P 

     Since im not a big fan of floral patterned and bright or pastel clothes especially when Meryl Streep as Miranda Priestly sarcastically said "Florals? For Spring? Groundbreaking..." in the movie The Devil Wears Prada (LOL), I have found another way to enjoy spring trends and that is through wearing Spring makeup! Yes! Bold colors, bare and glowing skin, simple and fresh bright eyes and colors that pop!:)  I think Spring is the best time for fashion and makeup lovers to play with colors.:))  Im loving fuchsia lips lately and Pantone`s 2013 Color of the Year, Emerald Green (I like any shade of green too! ;P).  Im loving Revlon`s Just Bitten Lip Balm Stain too which has a gorgeous fuchsia/hot pink shade called Sweetheart/Valentine. I think this color is great for simple and fresh everyday looks too when applied lightly. Plus it stains the lips and lasts longer compared to normal lipsticks and colored lip balms. Oh and did I say it smells like peppermint?;D  Cool eh?:D Anyway, im talking too much again. Here`s how I did my Spring Makeup!:)

What You Will Need:

Eye Cream or Eye Refresher Roll-On ( Optional if dont have puffy eyes and very dark under eye circles.),  Foundation and Moisturizer with SPF ( Mixed together to make tinted moisturizer) or Tinted Moisturizer,  Concealer and Highlighter.

Shimmery Light Green Eyeshadow, Shimmery White/Beige Eyeshadow (I used Virgin from UD Naked 1 Palette), Matte Brown Eyeshadow ( I used Buck from UD Naked Palette 1)

Eyebrow Pencil, Eyebrow Mascara (optional), Brown Eyeliner Pencil,  Your favorite mascara,  Your choice of Fuchsia lip color. ( You can use lipstick or just a lip stain.)

Directions:

1. Refresh your eyes by applying eye cream or using an eye roll-on. Prep your face as you normally do for your daytime natural makeup. My usual daytime face drill is to mix my moisturizer and foundation to make a tinted moisturizer. Set your face with powder or makeup setting spray. I use Avene Thermal Spring Water Spray though.:) It gives a dewy finish.:)
2. Conceal your undereye circles and blemishes. Lighten any dark spots using a highlighter.
3. Prime your eyes using an eye primer then apply shimmery White/Beige Eyeshadow all over your eyelids and crease area. Brush the remaining pigment on your lower lash lines and tear ducts.
4. Tap shimmery light green eyeshadow lightly all over the half of your top eyelids. Be careful not to bring it up to your crease and sweep the remaining green pigment on your outer lower lash lines. Blend well. 
5. To create depth in your eyes, apply a little amount of matte brown eyeshadow on the outer V of your eyelids, bring it up towards just half of the bottom part of your crease. Blend well using a tapered brush of blending brush. 
6. Tight line your upper lash lines with brown eyeliner pencil. Skip applying dark eyeliner on your waterlines this time.  Curl your lashes and apply mascara.
7. Lightly contour your face using a bronzer or contouring powder. Highlight your forehead, top of the apples of your cheeks, chin and the tip of your nose by sweeping a little amount of highlighting powder. Skip blush or just put on a little amount of light pink or coral blusher.
8. Apply your choice of fuchsia lip color on exfoliated and moisturized lips. Pucker up your lips, pump up that confidence and have a fabulous springtime!:D♥♥♥

Ready for Spring!:)

My latest rave! Revlon Just Bitten Lip Balm Stain in Sweetheart/Valentine shade.;)

Meu Esposo:)♥ ( Warning : The cheesy side of me!;P ))

      Valentines Day is coming up and im feeling a bit cheesy.  Tee hee!:D  Last night me and my hubby couldnt sleep and just spent the night watching old movies together while lying down in the carpet and hugging each other ( cheeeeeeeesy!;P).  While I rest my head on his arms, I suddenly realized that yesterday was our 6 years of being together not our wedding anniversary but the exact date that we started being together as a couple. :)

   So many challenges and hardships me and my husband had but im very grateful that we are still together.  You see, we didnt had it all worked out good all the time. We fought a lot and we still do up to now.  Our first year of marriage was the hardest time.  Some people close to us even think that we got married for all the wrong reasons.  We didnt even had a formal proposal or got married in church and had a formal wedding ceremony.  I even had a class to teach after we signed our marriage papers, so we didnt even had a celebration `cause I was rushing to go to work. LMFAO!:D  

     We  also had moments of giving up and just calling it quits but somehow or something has managed us to work things out.   Some people wonder how I keep up with my husbands` temper and behavior but for me I think they should wonder how he never gave up on me  and manage to keep up with me. But maybe we are really different from each on the outside but we`re really compatible on the inside. :D  

      I love Diego. He`s one of my best friends and one of the most real people I know. I look up to him for always being honest. When he doesnt like someone, he just simply dont keep up with them. He`s not mainstream and doesnt like the idea of social networks. He doesnt have a FB account and rarely checks the single social network site he is in.  He loves real talk and real conversations with real people. He`s anti fancy and no fuss of a person and hates anything that involves formality where you just cant be comfortable to be yourself.  Most of the time he`s not scared to show his emotions to anyone.  I think I can go on forever to mention all the reasons why I love him. LOL:)  I think im just in-love with meu esposo. LOL:D

     I dont know what the future still holds for us but im sure that no matter how me and my husband end up, be it still  together or not, what we have right now is real.  We have proved to ourselves that the issues some people thought about our relationship is wrong. Because if our love wasnt real we wouldnt be lying comfortably in the carpet, hugging each other and sharing simple but special moments like last night.:)    Our relationship isnt perfect at all but we have made all the flaws a good thing for us. We learn from each others faults and will always try our best to fix all the flaws.  No matter what happens, Diego has a very unique and special place in my heart that nobody can never replace.

Anti-Aging Stress Free Regimen (The Key for Good Relationships) ...and just one of my crazy random thoughts!;P

          I have been on my own these past few weeks and have started isolating myself. It is sometimes good for my well being.  I mean im not feeling emo or im depressed okay? Im so over that.  I just like being on my own sometimes and doing things by myself like watching a movie and dining out alone. I love being in solitude once in awhile. 

       I used to be (or maybe still am) a clingy friend. I love having good laughs with friends and talking about just anything even though we dont make sense anymore.  I love that feeling when you share random stories with a friend and find out that he/she can relate. Moments of real conversations and uncontrollable laughters and sometimes sharing sadness together.  But there will also be a time of misunderstandings with friends.

       Misunderstandings. I hate it when it happens especially with loved ones and friends. Im not a perfect friend and nobody is ( but I still think my my bestfriend since Grade 6 is perfect;P).  I  have my own issues and they have their own too. When that happens, its either you settle it someday and heal or never patch things up and leave a scar in your heart.

        I dont know if Im getting older but I have realize that even though its hard, I have to accept that I am sometimes the problem too and not the people around me. I have issues too and I should deal with it in the right manner.  I think ive got tired of fighting even when im the one whos on the right spot. I am tired of explaining every bit of myself and just respect anyones opinion about me. Arguing and fighting with someone is very time consuming and stressful. Even when youre right, sometimes its just better to say NOTHING at all. Because of that, I have been learning and practicing to just keep my head cool and zip my mouth from any negativity.  Im learning slowly day by day to walk away from any misunderstandings and trouble.  

      "Do not create friction to start a fire if you dont want to burn things down especially bridges.  If someone on the other side of the bridge is starting a fire, get plenty buckets of water and kill the fire or just simply abandon your spot and move somewhere safer"   That is what I keep on telling myself lately.  It is actually starting to be my personal mantra on relationships.  For me, it only means to keep myself away from drama.  If a misunderstanding is starting to build up,  I should stop it right away by being reasonable but humble and I shouldnt lose my temper and keep myself together by trying my best to respond positively.   "Do not create friction"  also means if someone is annoying the hell out of me, I should just keep my mouth shut because I have a choice to not let him/her rule out my emotions and stop me from being a better person.  What`s important is that, I should not let anything or anyone stop me from being happy and positive.  Sometimes,  problems dont start with me but with the other person and some people wont just simply let go of things and keep pushing it.  When that happens, I must just simply walk away and avoid the person without saying a word or respond negatively `cause it will only trigger anger and make things worse.

     You see its better to be all by yourself than to be with people that could only cause you so much pain and trouble.  Solitude is the key to be happy even though you are on your own.  You discover a lot of great things about yourself and start being your own bestfriend.  You dont even have to adjust or try to be somebody else`s expectations on how you should be.  Solitude is also one of the right choices if ever you abandon the emotional danger spot.  Another right choice is to meet new people or start hanging out with positive people who dont cause drama and are negative-free.  Besides, I want to age gracefully and any drama or stress is off limits! :P  

Wish me luck on this new regimen of mine to prevent wrinkles, age spots and crows feet! LOL!;D

DIY Brush Guard

        I want to buy myself a pack of The Brush Guard for my makeup brushes to keep them clean and in shape but I still dont know where to get them here in Osaka. So, while im still hunting for The Brush Guard, I have decided to make my own using tissue paper and tape. The tissue paper method is really good for big brushes like powder and blush brushes and the tape method is better for small brushes. . The right time to reshape and use a brush guard is when your brushes are not fully dry yet. Wait for your brushes to drain out excess water and when its already 70% dry. 

What You Will Need

• Tissue Paper
• Transparent Tape/Scotch Tape

Directions

Tissue Paper Method ( You`ll need tape here too)

• Get a piece of tissue paper. Fold it in half and place the ferrule part of your brush at the side end of the tissue.   

• Wrap the side end of the tissue on the brush and start rolling in the brush like wrapping spring rolls. 

• Tape the other end of the tissue when the brush is fully covered.

• Then slowly pull out the tissue a little bit. Just enough to hide the bristles and enough space to absorb water from the brush.

• Place your brushes the same way when drying them. You can use a rolled up towel or hang them using masking tape like what I did on my previous post on how to clean makeup brushes thoroughly. Click here if you havent seen it yet.:)    http://emifiedkindoflife.blogspot.jp/2013/02/woman-thou-shalt-clean-thy-makeup.html

Tape Method

• Another method is to use tape just by itself. This method is better for small brushes like eyeshadow brushes.  Just tape around the ferrule part of the brush backwards (adhesive or sticky part is on the outside). Make sure not to tape it tightly and make some room for the tape to move.

• Next slowly slide up the tape to the bristles part of the brush, covering the bristles part entirely but the half upper part of the tape should make space for water to drip down when drying the brushes downwards.  Like this...

• Dry your brushes downwards and wait for them to dry entirely. When your brushes are 100% dry already, you can now remove the brush guards and store your makeup brushes in a covered storage or in an ordinary makeup brush holder covered by a plastic or dust cover! :) ♥♥♥

Woman! Thou Shalt Clean Thy Makeup Brushes!

Thou Shalt Clean Thy Makeup Brushes!;)

Hiyeeee! Its me again!  Just want to share how I clean thoroughly my makeup brushes!:) There are a lot of easy and quick ways to clean makeup brushes but this is how I do mine every weekend when I want them to be really clean and bacteria-free.  I do this once a week, usually on days that I dont need to wear makeup and use my beauty power tools. On hectic makeup days I just spot clean them by wiping off leftover pigments on baby wipes EXCEPT my liquid foundation brush. Cream or Liquid foundation brushes should always be thoroughly washed after every application because dirt and bacteria cling easily on wet or damp things. Using dirty liquid foundation brushes is obviously gross. If youre gonna do that, you might just as well use a duster or broom to apply liquid foundation on your face. LOL;P 

Read on to know how to clean and care for your beauty tools!:)

What You Will Need

• Olive Oil
• Baby Shampoo or Anti-bacterial Dishwashing Soap
• A Dish/Plate
• Vinegar
• Container or Small Basin
• 2 Clean Towels. Big and Small.
• Masking Tape (optional)

How To

• Rinse makeup brushes on tepid or warm water. Be careful not to wet the upper part of the ferrule (metal part of the brush).  Squeeze out excess water from the brushes.   

• Mix baby shampoo or dishwashing soap with a small amount of olive oil on a dish. The olive oil will help to condition the bristles on your brush and shampoo or dishwashing soap will clean and dissolve any dirt and grime. I prefer using my daughter`s shampoo because it smells sooo nice and my brushes will smell like my daughter`s hair which I like to sniff all the time!;P tee hee!;))

Extra Virgin Olive Oil and my daughter`s baby shampoo!;)

• Swirl your brushes on the dish one by one and take out all dirt, old makeup, dead skin cells, oil, bacteria, ex-boyfriends... LOL;P Clean those brushes like a mad woman!;D

Gross!;P See all those old makeup, dirt and grime? Very unsightly!  Thats what youll put on your face if you dont clean your brushes!

• Rinse thoroughly your makeup brushes on warm running water. When you see water getting clear when rinsing thats when you know your brushes are squeaky clean. Squeeze out any remaining water on your brushes.

• Next prepare to disinfect your brushes by soaking them in a mixture of 2 to 3 tablespoons of vinegar and warm water (NOT HOT) in a basin or container. Do not fill up the basin/container. Make sure the water level  is just below the upper part of your brushes` ferrule. Soak them brushes for 5 to 10 minutes.

Vinegar and Water Solution. Cheap and kills bacteria effectively!

Soak them babies for 5 to 10 minutes.

•  After soaking the brushes on vinegar solution. Rinse them again with warm water and give your brushes a quick cold rinse to seal in the bristle hairs. Squeeze out all the excess water and dry them with a clean small towel. Set them to dry on a bigger towel by laying it flat on a surface and rolling one end inward. Lay your brushes on a slanted direction with the handles resting on the rolled part.  Nevah evah dry your brushes upright because water will seep into the ferrule and loosen the glue that holds the bristles in place.

A good way to dry your brushes. Nevah evah dry your army upright! Evaaaah!;P lol

• Another way to dry your brushes is to tape the handles on a masking tape and stick the tape on a wall or anywhere where masking tape can hold on strongly. Like this....;P

Sometimes I prefer to dry my brushes this way `cause it doesnt ruin the shape of my brushes especially when I dont have a brush guard to keep it in shape.

There are quick and easier ways to clean your brushes and find out whats the best way for you. I just prefer it this way and im not saying that this is the best way to clean makeup brushes.:) As long as your brushes are clean enough to use there`s no problem!:) Cleaning and caring for your makeup brushes is very important because it prevents your face from breakouts and it makes makeup application easier. Who would also want dirt on their face right?;P  Be gorgeous not grossgeous!;D 

NOTE: Brushguards are really great for keeping your brushes in shape but when you dont have them you can always reshape your brushes the old way or try making DIY brushguards!  I`ll be posting and sharing how to make DIY brushguards soon. Goodluck and I hope this post helps!:) Mwah!